To whomever cleaned the bath tub and kitchen today - thanks!

Like a miracle, the bath tub became cleaner overnight. There was this spot, on the left side near the middle, that wouldn't come clean - but today it was gone. My first reaction was that Tess probably did it, but that explanation fails to satisfy my innate sense of wonder. Perhaps it is because I have read too much Irish folklore, but I want to believe that there is a sparkling and magical Otherworld, which intersects our own. The little people are all around us, and we need only to put aside all the trappings of adulthood, and return to our childlike selves to be able to see them.

I imagine going to the bathroom some early morning and as I draw near the door I hear small voices, singing the sort of jolly songs that make work go faster. I peek inside and find a tiny gnome sleeping by the sink with his hat over his eyes, and his little bucket and mop propped against the cotton swabs. I'd pull back the shower curtain slowly and quietly, to see his little friends scrubbing the tub, rapelling with detal floss down the walls of the shower stall, and polishing the chrome spigot with some magical cleanser that only the wee ones know the secret of making.

After reveling in this rare sight for a bit, I'd gently pick up the one on the vanity, and shake him awake. Once he had a moment to rub the sand from his eyes, I'd lean in so close that I'd be able to see the tiny flower in the buttonhole of his wee little lapel, and I'd say...

"GET BACK TO WORK YOU LAZY LITTLE BITCH! DON'T YOU SEE THE FILTH ON THE FLOOR BY THE HEAT REGISTER!? AND HAVE YOU LOOKED IN CORLEY'S FUCKING ROOM!? THERE'S MOLD APPROACHING SENTIENCE IN THERE! I'M TEMPTED TO JUST DUMP A HUNGRY CAT IN HERE WITH YOU WORTHLESS LITTLE FUCKERS AND COME BACK IN THE MORNING! NOW GET IN MY ROOM AND SWEEP BEHIND THE BED, YOU NO-GREENCARD-HAVIN' LITTLE BASTARD!! Wonder of the Celtic Otherworld, my ass..."

*DISCLAIMER* (to keep the hippy-pagans of the Flock happy...)
No Wee People were harmed in the making of this post.